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In Valerie Ramsey’s case, her mother had led a glamorous life with a high-profile career working for Pan Am airlines in the 1940s. Once Valerie’s six children left home, she sought that same glamour and prestige that her mother enjoyed, and obtained it quite successfully by becoming a public speaker and runway model. In contrast, Piper Leigh tried to replicate one of her mother’s ways but it didn’t feel authentic to her. Piper’s mother kept in touch with a large group of extended family and friends through their many moves by religiously sending them all Christmas cards. Piper tried that but found the obligation too oppressive. Instead, she questioned: “What if I let them go?” In doing so, she found that “I began to trust that my web of connections would change and shift, whether I wrote those cards or not.” |